“ Where is Father?” I walked towards the garden where my Mother was having her usual early walks. Just before the sun sets above, she always had her walks with the palace royalties, talking with certainty in the providence of good fortunes and what she called the better-for-all-emmisaries.
“ You do not bother my early routine, Catherine.” She replied while busy having some chit-chats with other Duchesses and Parliament leaders.
“ I asked politely, Mother, and I intend that you reply me with the same courtesy.”
“ Why can’t you be like Alice- who walks and talks like dignitaries and respects other people’s noses.” She turned to me.
My head ticked for a while. I sighed and turned away. It’d be better for me to just turn away rather than clash with her.
I went down to the abyss where my Father would spend his early days at the old room--his father’s sanctuary. Though the place was considered to be of forbidden among us-- Phillip, Alice and I, my feet would take each steps alightly. My hands held the cold bronze railings among the stairs as if strength can be taken up among the rust it gives off. And by then that I heard soft whispers, mild, gentle and longing,like a wolf cries but it wasn’t. It was a man soft and gentle cries. As I drew closer at the door, the whisper grew louder.
“ Father? Are you in there?” I called.
I waited for a response. Yet, no one answered. A cold and misty air crept from my foot and shot my body with numbness. Shrieks and a gust of sudden icy cold air blew right toward my face. And for a moment, I was struck-frozen to the idea of what it seems to be.
“ Catherine! Catherine!” I felt my shoulder moved. “ Catherine!” Father was holding down my shoulder shaking me to get back to my senses.
I sucked in air and looked as if I ran for so many miles.
“ Father,” My voice trailed off and looked for his eyes.
“ Oh, Heavens!” He took me into his arms and gave me a bone-shattering hug.
“ What happened?” I asked him when he freed me.
“ You gave me a fright, young lady.” He said still holding my shoulders. “ Why did you came down here? Didn’t I forbid you all your siblings to never set afoot in here.
“ What was that ambiance? the coldness that I felt?” I asked him in total perplexity.
“ Get upstairs and drank some water. I could mistake you for a cold body, ready to be shipped into the coffin.” He then trailed the contours of my face and he looked as if he aged quite a year or so. I nodded and stalked back upstairs.
Both of us walked inside his room. He felt uneasy-walking back and forth thinking. I knew he was troubled enough. King Henry has never been in uncertain position nor to be disturbed. But though my mind kept busy on the actions he had made, I couldn’t let my curiosity stagnate. I shuddered at the idea.
“ Father, please have a seat with me.” I told him looking worried about his sudden behavior.
He stopped and looked back at me. He took a sigh. “ You told me that you were looking for me, what about it?”
Without hearing his questions, I asked him directly. “ Father, are you sick? or even hiding something from me?”
He shook his head and took a seat beside mine, took my hands and cupped it. “ I’ve seen you last night with Old Ali. What did both of you talked about?”
My mind was still occupied and fancied to gazed at him. The odd perplexion of the earlier scene deliberately excused momentarily, as my daughter instinct took abode. I looked at him in his cold aquamarine eyes with the same pair of colors as mine.
My King, my beloved father.
He ruled the land when he was sixteen and looking at him in his age of forty-nine, so young, yet he held the world in his hands. All lives depended on him as he struggles to look for certainties to found a prolific world. Wars, victories and triumphs or captivities and losses, he took them inch by inch, got himself along at the sideways of wars for he, himself was a knight alone. But that alone isn’t the victories he won. No battle can consider himself triumphant enough yet his victory was fathering a world, his citizens, his subjects and us alone.
And now, I am torn between the things that I wanted and the things I needed to fulfill- my own duties. The night Old Ali and I talked, I knew the world around me turned upside-down. I was in complete diasphora. Nevertheless, it didn’t affect the totality of my own oblivion. Though, what Old Ali told has shook me to my senses, there are still dimensions of my own that are still being kept. Fear has nothing to do with the sudden abruptions of my actions. Maybe.
“ Catherine,” Father’s voice awoke me to my realization. “ It seems your mind has wander without direction again.”
I smiled at him.
“Father, is there anything that made you thwart everything that you had and have a comfortable life?”
His brows met and was baffled at the question I threw back to him. Then, it shocked me, for he laughed--laughed to his heart content. I never seen him much overwhelmed and it didn’t bothered me if I was a laughingstock or the words might’ve been ridiculous. The satisfaction it held me was that he was laughing-a rare moment I had with my father or with a king perhaps.
He cleared his throat and started to recount days among his past.
“ I never thought that among my three wonderful children, it was you, the youngest, the vulnerable and the timid one would come up with a query with the same one my father has asked me on his death-bed.”
“ He did?” Of course, I never seen my Grandfather. He was killed on a war and I wasn’t even breathing on the planet.
“ He did.” He replied and prompted a look outside his own fortress. He probably was thinking how he outlived the grandeur he had during his early years and the sumptous glory that never fades away. His eyes dazzled at hiw thoughts. He took a relief sigh and tuned toward me.
“ During that time, I lived comfortably that it didn’t crossed my mind the aftermath of my own dominion. I lived like any kings would- life of luxuries, power and glory, unsurpassing wealth and victories over victories. I am the king of everything, it’s as if I held the world. I am the world, conqueror and the only heir. Everything here was mine and revolves around me. I didn’t intend to share it to anyone. It was all but mine.
His eyes met mine. As he says those words, I could see the very things he had just thrown to me. I could even see his greed, his power and his dominion.
Everything.
He owned the world-like he was Zeus.
“ When everything I wanted became mine, everything fell back. The marriage between your Mother and I ruined what was the ideal life I already had. I’ve never been angrier in my life back then and had a scheming father. I never had intend to have a marriage or settle back then. I am in control of what I am. I hated the world, more likely on your mother. But he was completely different from the mistresses I had affairs with.”
I let a soft chuckle and went behind my father and let him sat down.
He continued. “ Much as I hated her, she too, loathed me. The hatred that stirred up inside me was the night she slapped me right in front of everybody at the ball. How could a noble duchess hit a mighty rock like I am. I am a King-conqueror of the world. I was mad at the whole world that I decided to drop the marriage. Then, the King told me, ‘ You made her victorious against you again.’ So I decided to become her worst foe. But look at where we are right now, the loss I have announced to the world was the gain I could never have if I didn’t took chances of. She never complained and wept silently behind my back.”
“ Was it the feministic side of mother that brought you to your senses?” I asked him.
“ No. When Phillip came in, of course, I was beyond merry but that didn’t kept me from being what I was, Alice came and still the same. That was when I decided to go far beyond the walls of this kingdom. I seeked victory over victories all over the kingdom and made myself glorious beyond anybody else. I wasn’t there for the two of your siblings. They grew up to be the finest one, a father could always be proud of, but never be me. It was the declaration of fatherhood at my household, capable of being held by your mother on my neck. I wouldn’t be like any other King who was too lofty and soft on every family ties.
The loss we had at the small kingdom in Persia, was undeniably the turning point of everything. I lost. I lost thousands of greatest warriors, great generals and great armies including the King, himself. The world lamented as the last words of Father haunted me down. The death of the greatest King, turned everything to crumble. The colonial kingdoms seek revenged against their mother country. Without my Father, I thought I couldn’t do. The darkest days of my life has found its light on your mother. As the kingdom was sought to be on attack, I was trapped inside the kingdom and had left inside. There’s nothing I could do but to be a knight herein, or the only things I had could be lost, forever. I saw the beauty of your mother, how foolish I was to disregard everything she had done until she was undeniably in loss of her life. She conceived you but our merriment deteriorated when her life was at the brim of Hades’ kingdom.
A king, most powerful in the world was yet again, powerless. That was the irony of life. That was when the Kings last words echoed on my ears, hunting me every time I would see your mother suffering. To no ones eyes, we confided every clever and wise man on this kingdom, far and wide to search for cure. I had never been so fearful in my life than I was that time. And we never found. It was like I was hopeless and fervorly anxious. I was losing. One night, your mother and I talked, it was the first decent talk I had with her.” He gazed upon me, looking warily uncomposed with himself.
“ You know the story then, Catherine.” He added.
I nodded.
“ The tale your mother and I have talked often was half-truth.” He gazed at me again.
“ And what is the reality?”
“ Both your mother and I conceals the tale behind it, professed that it should be kept till our grave.”
“ I didn’t understand, Father. Wasn’t it better for me to know the truth behind it? It concerns me, therefore, I could possibly have the rights to know it.”
“ It is, but of age to come. The question you asked simply was yours to know inside you. As for me, living comfortably was mere an illusion. I simply cannot be where am I today if I had left everything out. Happiness, everything has its own, in due course. Much more to the triumph I had with you. The past was bitter enough to savour the future’s sweetness. I wouldn’t savour nor lavish the small wealth I had if it were not because of the fear, anxiety, loss and catastrophe. But never hope for the grave misfortunes to come upon you. As long as there was enough time, be wise enough to judge and carefully work out the whole thing-without resolving to a bitter end. Do not wait for a dire things or a hellish moment to arrive until you realize the consequences of your actions.”
He smiled at me as he patted my head. “ Ah, my dear, alas! To no one’s heart, you are simply a fragile little girl but in my heart, you are always the daughter I would have. Phillip and Alice will forever be my little ones but with own mind, principles and heart. Of courage and valour, they do have but what you have can never be like them-a wise mind and a heart, bigger than I am. You cannot be like them so never be in comparison with them. They have chosen their path while you stood at the crossroad.
Ali, I fear he had talked to you last night, seems to have opened your mind at last. It was too sooner than I thought. Now, the anxiety I felt before has come again. The doubts and worries of a father has come forth at last and I cannot be a master over it. Fate chooses its way to unfold the story.”
“ Father, I fear for your words. I beg you to...”
He shook his head. “ I should have been prepared for this but I was but a coward to even lose one among my children.”
Lose? The pounding in my heart started to knock.
“ Perhaps,”
“ Perhaps, my King, you needed rest.” The door opened with my mother . She held her head high and stared at me. “ And you Catherine, off you go for your daily duties.”
My eyes went from father to mother as the two converse with their stares and glares. “ But Mother, we aren’t through.”
“ Yes, you are, Catherine. when I said you needed to go along, you go along.” She said commanding and strong.
Once again, my ill-will beyond my Mother, arises. “ And if you say that I would kill myself, I heed for your words?”
“ Do not provoke me, Catherine, you might as well, don’t like the reply I would be having.”
“ Stop it, Vittoria!” Henry’s voice soared up. He looked at me and nodded. “ Go along, now Catherine. I’ve changed your course for the day. Heed for the archery and swordsmanship.”
I bowed my head and head for the door. As the door closed, I could hear the exchange of words they would be having. To no avail, the blame was on me.
I went back to my room and took my bows and arrows together with a silver dagger. The door flung openly with Alice outside.
“ I hear that you...”
“ Yes, you heard. The King and the Queen had a row and was duly my fault.” I couldn’t helped but to cut short her accusations.
“ How dare you!” Alice was furiously red.
“ You do not know the whole thing, Alice, so don’t pick it.” I hurriedly put on the hand stabilizers on my arms and tied it.
“ You do not tell me what to do, Catherine. I still am your older sister.”
I stopped midway and turned to her. “ I do, Alice.”
“ Phillip and I left you the care for our beloved King and Queen and simply this was your way of doing your sense of responsibility?”
“I tell you, Alice, the responsibility that you’re trying to make me understand is the responsibility that held your neck from doing the very responsibility that’s supposed to be yours. This isn’t about you chasing your own dreams but having the sense of duty duly for your family. Neither you nor Phillip understands what the King wants. Forget what lies beyond the past.”
“ That’s easy for you to say. Oh, you wouldn’t even know unless you put yourself on our shoes. You wouldn’t even know the life without having a Father to call on. Yes, perhaps, he was physically there but he was a walking corpse with us. You didn’t know how hard it was for both of us-Phillip and I.”
“ Then don’t pity yourself, Alice. Perhaps you were right. But we’re just the same, or much more worse than you are. You had everything. While I only got Father’s. You had the whole kingdom’s love as well as mother’s and even Phillip does, but they treat me as worthless crap. Now, which of us was treated fair?” I took my sword and left her there.
6/22/11
6/21/11
Act 2
“ Make way, Her Royal Highness, has arrived.”
Old faces, new faces, men alikes and women, come varying to the grounds of market. Men of all sizes, ages and of stages in life always come in chances to have luck herein. Beyond immeasurably power and wealth I had, I am nothing but as powerless and a beggar like them. How ironic for a world I live in. I am nothing but a title indeed. As my eyes feasted at the wayward impoverish lifestyle, I frowned at the sight.
No matter how much wealth a person may succumbed, emptiness always perpetrate his life. So do, I. I have everything but I am nothing but a young monarch and of ages--shall be a successor. Oftentimes I convinced myself that I shall rule rightfully with good judgment and character-fair enough with the wisest decision. All my plans, I somehow know that things changes thru the course of time. It maybe my plausible sense of life but it would be entirely a different one that is, in due time.
I look around at the people.
Commoner.
That is the word I described them. True enough, it was a scoff for them. But believe me, I never intend to slap them that title. My heart intends to throw the crown and the glory I have, just to embrace them or open the doors, but I couldn’t.
I just couldn’t.
I want to do something but I’m bound to do the other way around. Ironic, isn’t it?
“ Princess!” With cheeks so red and some freckles across her face, a young girl waves toward me. She was rugged, dressed in patches of old clothes. Her hands look rough and untidy. I couldn’t imagine how would an innocent and fragile little child like her would be trapped in a world run by Sheol. I looked back at her. And she smiled like that of a million among the grimaces. Only her had found the way to cheer me up.
“ Hoooh, Thunder.” I halted my horse and get down on foot. But before a walk was made, a palace guard came in and had barricaded my way.
“ Princess, it is not wise to stoop down to your level.”
“ Only wiser men do know how to take down from what they’re afraid of. Carry on. I wanted to take air from the people.” I held my hand and walked. “ Get up from your knees, citizens of my King’s kingdom. I came in peace and as a woman-worthy to be called as a citizen herein. Come along to your duty. I only wish to walk according to your statutes.”
Some faces are in astonishment, others, dismissed the idea and go on with me and some, smiled and satisfied. I walked on the streets with Thunder, holding his reign while both my mind and my eyes wander. And all to soon, I passed them by going to the gates of our kingdom.
Trumpets sound, alarming each and every one of the palace that I was again, held in captivity. I sighed at the scene. While everyone bows for my return, I am yet again, unhappy.
“ Do you now defy me , young woman?” Mother entered unannounced inside my room.
“ I do not defy you, Mother. I simply wanted...” From the bathtub, my voice trailed off to the scenic millieu I had earlier.
“ Wanted freedom?” She asked still not breaking her eyes on me. “ We do not have those wealth my child. Simply all of us are tied to the bondage of our kingship-serving for the greater glory.”
“ I knew, Mother. But still, can I just have a little of liberty among it- even for just an atom size?” I looked at her.
“ You simply had your statutes been corrupted, my dear. You are confide from the palace walls. You go straight from your duties and no horseback riding or lessons. Do not put your family’s name in disdain. The air that we breathe are the same as yours.”
I stood up, without caring my nudity and faced her. “ You confide yourself at the walls of palace but you never stoop down to care about your subjects. You never bother to see the reality outside. How dare you to say that you care for your own people when you do not even know how the world treats them.”
“ We do not give a damn if they have nothing and we have everything.”
“ Hear the words you are speaking, Mother and tell me if you are the right one to stood up for this kingdom.”
“ You do not question my ways, you still have years to spent by and someday, you’ll definitely say the same things.”
“ I will never be, Mother. Now please, go.”
“ We’ll be waiting for you at banquet.” She left without a word.
The banquet was gracious like it has been. All five of us--King Henry, Queen Vittoria, Duke of Hampton-Prince Phillip, Duchess of Wayward- Princess Alessandra and I, Duchess of Hampshire-Princess Catherine were joined by the noble bloods and aristocrats at the dinner hall.
“ Catherine, I heard you have just escaped from your ladies.” It was Alice who murmured at me. She was my older sibling. She’s sweet, caring and adorable-as all the men in the land came to sought after her, then only, Prince Peter adored and asked her hand in marriage.
“ I did, Alice. But believe me, I just needed to confide my thoughts.”
“ And to whom? To the trees and to the sands.” Her smile faded and looked upon me.
Alice was the prettiest and I had always been compared to the marred beauty, my sister has. She has been the apple of the eye in the kingdom while, I gained my Father’s only eyes.
“ That is marvelous, Alice. Thank you.” I said sarcastically and took a nibble of peas.
“ Do not be sarcastic, Catherine.” She eyed at me and her gaze went to the spectators. “ I only care about Mother’s condition or even Father. I do not wish them to be so worried while you go and hop around. Can’t you do that while we were away.”
“ What’s the point, sister? Both you and Phillip chases your dream while you got me stuck under Mother’s nose. And heaven forbids, she is worser than I thought.”
“ Do not mock Mother like that, Catherine. Remember that she was our mother more than anything else.” Phillip looked at me.
“ Yes, and you always made me feel to be the villain around.” I drank the wine and stood up.
“ And where do you think you’re going, Catherine? The banquet hasn’t finished yet.” It was Father who spoke, mild and gentle.
“ I apologize, Father, but I’m not feeling well and it would be my delight that I may retire now.”
“ Just for a moment, Catherine. This banquet is for you. Can you just sat for a while? The guest hasn’t arrived yet as we presume he was on his way.” Father held my hand, convincing me like I was a small little girl.
I nodded and headed on my chair. And just as he said about the guest, I turned to my right and stared at an empty seat. How dare does this person await us for such a time?
My eyes roamed around from the ball ‘round the people. I stood up from my seat and wander down to the balcony and held myself at the side of it watching the tiny lights beyond the fortress glow in dim.
“ Ay, me.” I sighed and looked at the chilly night outside. “ Why aren’t there are people who understand the life beyond here than the freedom. Such people do not even know how fathomable the life is.”
“ It is not wise for a lady to worry about her gregarious contempt for the world.” A voice suddenly crept from my behind.
It was Alistair, an old teacher who lives at the tower inside the castle but was told to be of vile and austere in many ways. He seems snobbish and held his head at everyone. But though he was described, in a manner not worthy for a creature to stoop down, the king held high respects for his intelligence.
“ And why are you here, sire?” I asked him without taking my eyes off from the tiny lights just beyond.
“ Ah!” He exclaimed and went beside me. “ Shouldn’t I be the one asking you the same question?”
“ I asked first, Sire.” I prompted and looked at him.
His hair now hang loosely as it became white, probably of age to suit him. He wears his almond spectacles just at the middle of his crooked long nose and his white beard about 5-inches of long. His lips curved a smile, looking beamingly stunned at my statements for him. While his eyes yet deep blue as the midnight sky glared at me.
“ I presume that my existence makes the air too thick at the hall that I decided to let them breathe a few carbons. And you?”
“ Whilst everyone found this night interesting, I found it dull instead.”
“ And what would be your choice of interest? Wander around at the forest or gawking like anybody without putting in mind that she was of noble-blood.”
“ Oh, so you’ve come to slap on my face that the honor of being a noble be of a crowning glory? How generous of you, Sire. Noble blood or not, it should be a man’s glory to be of natural-be it living his life as it is or live the life, destiny has succumbed unto him.”
“ True, true, true enough, young mistress, but living as to what the earth asked you to live by shall always be your shadow. You do not turn your back to the world itself or to your own principles. You always have to weigh everything according to the rights and laws of the world-- the Heavens asked for and to the laws of Mankind. Weigh everything as it should be-not only for yourself but to the generativity of each and everyone.
True enough that you’re born with bigger responsibilities but your heart tells you to do another thing. And, if you weigh your heart and your mind, which of those weigh the better?”
“ I... I don’t...” My mind raced back and forth, looking for answers I could never utter. My heart weighs more but the conscience goes together with my mind. I still am a prisoner of my own.
“ I see,” He butted in. He folded his arms and walked around-maybe trying to be wise again- or supplied words that even made me perplexed. “ I see that your mind and your heart races together to know their own inner strength. Your heart speaks like your conscience but your mind was your alter ego.
We are bound by the set of rules of this world, prisoners of our past and dreamers of an utopian tomorrow. Nevertheless, each and every one of us forgot the point that we are mere human. We aren’t gods nor demi-gods but humans-mortal ones.”
“ And your point is?” I asked him.
“ You are wise enough but you’re judgment has been clouded. For the sake of you, let your worries go. Be bold enough and be brave to take chances on what you feel like doing. Sometimes, deviation turns the world into its right track. The evil in the eye of others, makes this world perfect in its own volition.” But before he could left me, he turned and said the words, “ Let your wisdom be watered everyday. You know where to find them.”
What I heard next was the laughter, the merriment inside the castle. All of it held a small world inside. As I look at the innermost utopian world outside, it has its own perfection but in the sense of odd, guile and evil outside. It took fears of the world to summon the mask to cover the truth. True to the world’s irony was the sense of having a rotten world.
Old faces, new faces, men alikes and women, come varying to the grounds of market. Men of all sizes, ages and of stages in life always come in chances to have luck herein. Beyond immeasurably power and wealth I had, I am nothing but as powerless and a beggar like them. How ironic for a world I live in. I am nothing but a title indeed. As my eyes feasted at the wayward impoverish lifestyle, I frowned at the sight.
No matter how much wealth a person may succumbed, emptiness always perpetrate his life. So do, I. I have everything but I am nothing but a young monarch and of ages--shall be a successor. Oftentimes I convinced myself that I shall rule rightfully with good judgment and character-fair enough with the wisest decision. All my plans, I somehow know that things changes thru the course of time. It maybe my plausible sense of life but it would be entirely a different one that is, in due time.
I look around at the people.
Commoner.
That is the word I described them. True enough, it was a scoff for them. But believe me, I never intend to slap them that title. My heart intends to throw the crown and the glory I have, just to embrace them or open the doors, but I couldn’t.
I just couldn’t.
I want to do something but I’m bound to do the other way around. Ironic, isn’t it?
“ Princess!” With cheeks so red and some freckles across her face, a young girl waves toward me. She was rugged, dressed in patches of old clothes. Her hands look rough and untidy. I couldn’t imagine how would an innocent and fragile little child like her would be trapped in a world run by Sheol. I looked back at her. And she smiled like that of a million among the grimaces. Only her had found the way to cheer me up.
“ Hoooh, Thunder.” I halted my horse and get down on foot. But before a walk was made, a palace guard came in and had barricaded my way.
“ Princess, it is not wise to stoop down to your level.”
“ Only wiser men do know how to take down from what they’re afraid of. Carry on. I wanted to take air from the people.” I held my hand and walked. “ Get up from your knees, citizens of my King’s kingdom. I came in peace and as a woman-worthy to be called as a citizen herein. Come along to your duty. I only wish to walk according to your statutes.”
Some faces are in astonishment, others, dismissed the idea and go on with me and some, smiled and satisfied. I walked on the streets with Thunder, holding his reign while both my mind and my eyes wander. And all to soon, I passed them by going to the gates of our kingdom.
Trumpets sound, alarming each and every one of the palace that I was again, held in captivity. I sighed at the scene. While everyone bows for my return, I am yet again, unhappy.
“ Do you now defy me , young woman?” Mother entered unannounced inside my room.
“ I do not defy you, Mother. I simply wanted...” From the bathtub, my voice trailed off to the scenic millieu I had earlier.
“ Wanted freedom?” She asked still not breaking her eyes on me. “ We do not have those wealth my child. Simply all of us are tied to the bondage of our kingship-serving for the greater glory.”
“ I knew, Mother. But still, can I just have a little of liberty among it- even for just an atom size?” I looked at her.
“ You simply had your statutes been corrupted, my dear. You are confide from the palace walls. You go straight from your duties and no horseback riding or lessons. Do not put your family’s name in disdain. The air that we breathe are the same as yours.”
I stood up, without caring my nudity and faced her. “ You confide yourself at the walls of palace but you never stoop down to care about your subjects. You never bother to see the reality outside. How dare you to say that you care for your own people when you do not even know how the world treats them.”
“ We do not give a damn if they have nothing and we have everything.”
“ Hear the words you are speaking, Mother and tell me if you are the right one to stood up for this kingdom.”
“ You do not question my ways, you still have years to spent by and someday, you’ll definitely say the same things.”
“ I will never be, Mother. Now please, go.”
“ We’ll be waiting for you at banquet.” She left without a word.
The banquet was gracious like it has been. All five of us--King Henry, Queen Vittoria, Duke of Hampton-Prince Phillip, Duchess of Wayward- Princess Alessandra and I, Duchess of Hampshire-Princess Catherine were joined by the noble bloods and aristocrats at the dinner hall.
“ Catherine, I heard you have just escaped from your ladies.” It was Alice who murmured at me. She was my older sibling. She’s sweet, caring and adorable-as all the men in the land came to sought after her, then only, Prince Peter adored and asked her hand in marriage.
“ I did, Alice. But believe me, I just needed to confide my thoughts.”
“ And to whom? To the trees and to the sands.” Her smile faded and looked upon me.
Alice was the prettiest and I had always been compared to the marred beauty, my sister has. She has been the apple of the eye in the kingdom while, I gained my Father’s only eyes.
“ That is marvelous, Alice. Thank you.” I said sarcastically and took a nibble of peas.
“ Do not be sarcastic, Catherine.” She eyed at me and her gaze went to the spectators. “ I only care about Mother’s condition or even Father. I do not wish them to be so worried while you go and hop around. Can’t you do that while we were away.”
“ What’s the point, sister? Both you and Phillip chases your dream while you got me stuck under Mother’s nose. And heaven forbids, she is worser than I thought.”
“ Do not mock Mother like that, Catherine. Remember that she was our mother more than anything else.” Phillip looked at me.
“ Yes, and you always made me feel to be the villain around.” I drank the wine and stood up.
“ And where do you think you’re going, Catherine? The banquet hasn’t finished yet.” It was Father who spoke, mild and gentle.
“ I apologize, Father, but I’m not feeling well and it would be my delight that I may retire now.”
“ Just for a moment, Catherine. This banquet is for you. Can you just sat for a while? The guest hasn’t arrived yet as we presume he was on his way.” Father held my hand, convincing me like I was a small little girl.
I nodded and headed on my chair. And just as he said about the guest, I turned to my right and stared at an empty seat. How dare does this person await us for such a time?
My eyes roamed around from the ball ‘round the people. I stood up from my seat and wander down to the balcony and held myself at the side of it watching the tiny lights beyond the fortress glow in dim.
“ Ay, me.” I sighed and looked at the chilly night outside. “ Why aren’t there are people who understand the life beyond here than the freedom. Such people do not even know how fathomable the life is.”
“ It is not wise for a lady to worry about her gregarious contempt for the world.” A voice suddenly crept from my behind.
It was Alistair, an old teacher who lives at the tower inside the castle but was told to be of vile and austere in many ways. He seems snobbish and held his head at everyone. But though he was described, in a manner not worthy for a creature to stoop down, the king held high respects for his intelligence.
“ And why are you here, sire?” I asked him without taking my eyes off from the tiny lights just beyond.
“ Ah!” He exclaimed and went beside me. “ Shouldn’t I be the one asking you the same question?”
“ I asked first, Sire.” I prompted and looked at him.
His hair now hang loosely as it became white, probably of age to suit him. He wears his almond spectacles just at the middle of his crooked long nose and his white beard about 5-inches of long. His lips curved a smile, looking beamingly stunned at my statements for him. While his eyes yet deep blue as the midnight sky glared at me.
“ I presume that my existence makes the air too thick at the hall that I decided to let them breathe a few carbons. And you?”
“ Whilst everyone found this night interesting, I found it dull instead.”
“ And what would be your choice of interest? Wander around at the forest or gawking like anybody without putting in mind that she was of noble-blood.”
“ Oh, so you’ve come to slap on my face that the honor of being a noble be of a crowning glory? How generous of you, Sire. Noble blood or not, it should be a man’s glory to be of natural-be it living his life as it is or live the life, destiny has succumbed unto him.”
“ True, true, true enough, young mistress, but living as to what the earth asked you to live by shall always be your shadow. You do not turn your back to the world itself or to your own principles. You always have to weigh everything according to the rights and laws of the world-- the Heavens asked for and to the laws of Mankind. Weigh everything as it should be-not only for yourself but to the generativity of each and everyone.
True enough that you’re born with bigger responsibilities but your heart tells you to do another thing. And, if you weigh your heart and your mind, which of those weigh the better?”
“ I... I don’t...” My mind raced back and forth, looking for answers I could never utter. My heart weighs more but the conscience goes together with my mind. I still am a prisoner of my own.
“ I see,” He butted in. He folded his arms and walked around-maybe trying to be wise again- or supplied words that even made me perplexed. “ I see that your mind and your heart races together to know their own inner strength. Your heart speaks like your conscience but your mind was your alter ego.
We are bound by the set of rules of this world, prisoners of our past and dreamers of an utopian tomorrow. Nevertheless, each and every one of us forgot the point that we are mere human. We aren’t gods nor demi-gods but humans-mortal ones.”
“ And your point is?” I asked him.
“ You are wise enough but you’re judgment has been clouded. For the sake of you, let your worries go. Be bold enough and be brave to take chances on what you feel like doing. Sometimes, deviation turns the world into its right track. The evil in the eye of others, makes this world perfect in its own volition.” But before he could left me, he turned and said the words, “ Let your wisdom be watered everyday. You know where to find them.”
What I heard next was the laughter, the merriment inside the castle. All of it held a small world inside. As I look at the innermost utopian world outside, it has its own perfection but in the sense of odd, guile and evil outside. It took fears of the world to summon the mask to cover the truth. True to the world’s irony was the sense of having a rotten world.
Act 1
The scorching blaze of the sun kissed my skin as the wind blows my hair.I meant not to escape from the fortress of my haven nor to deviate the laws I commanded. Yet, as a woman I am confide to have a liberty of my own. My own freedom as I may please.
“ Hoooh” I held my Lipizzaner horse to halt.
The view was astounding that it held my breathe in captive. The ‘ole green fields of vast lands now mounted the joys to be harvested in no time. Harks flew beneath the surfaces of the blue ocean. Pavements glistened to the mere commoners of the villages as joy surmounted the faces of ‘ole folks.
“ Come now, Thunder. The heaven awaits.” as if I was merely talking to a human.
He bolt in like his name and roars to the wind, flying freely to the gusts of wind. I looked back and saw the mountain of our fortress--the world I am confide with. And from the heights of the swift tango we danced with Thunder, I rested him under the cozy and shady oak trees in a nearby river afloats. In a small bag fasten to Thunder, I took off a rustic cloak and wore it. I tucked in my long golden hair carefully.
Down the green set of valleys and a falls watering the streams and the surrounding botanicals, I set on foot. The greeneries of meadows and the fragrare of floras all juxtaposely brought out the forthcoming spring. Even the twittering birds dance and melodiously sang the tunes of spring.
Ah, at last my journey sets on. Not far enough now, behind the valleys, lies a village of an utopian paradiso- my soulful realm. Indeed, a marvelous creation of the heavens. Though at the sight of our kingdom it was a realm of complete utopia, my version of utopia was no more than a complete serenity, complete and submerge beauty like a heaven of fantasies.
The sun twinkles behind the tall and shady evergreens and pines. And of the trees shoots sparkling beams of rays like diamonds etched on your skin. The sways of the surging trees whispers to your ears, singing melodies to lullabys. And as the coldness of the winds wrapped around me, the containment of breeze no longer upholds my longingness for nature. I lowered the cloak and took off my feet’s garments, and walked.
It was subjugated to become a fantasy for me-a real fantasy indeed. A crystal clear spring with wild flowers around, like meadows in Southern France or in Ireland. Oh, such majestic realm--a treasure worth a lifetime. It cannot be compared to the Eden of Israel though both has its own paradise.
I sat on the brim of the spring and soaked my feet to the cold waters.
Comforting yet reviting.
Ah! the smell of freedom, sweet and fragrant. How I could hope for liberty, away from the walls of kingship. How many times have I took a bolder steps for freedom but was never been? Defiance brought out the worst in me. Good heavens! I was glad that they haven’t pass an excommunication order against me and perhaps it won’t be long overdue.
The passing hours has been wearisome that my body was in sore from being held captive. How ironic that inside my own fortress, a ruler and dominant, would be held among her kingdom.
“I just wanted to get away.” I heard myself mutter the words. “ Even for a while.” And dove straight to the waters. Just for a while, I can be alone.
I closed my eyes and serenely be one with the nature.
Depressions of waters brushed towards my face. And slowly opened my eyes and sank at the bottom. Without further noise nor scratch to made, I simply looked around to see the cause of the tiny waves, it simply wasn’t a wave caused by fallen leaves nor flowers or pebbles.
Nothing has shown a cautious distrust and relief erroded my chest. As I kicked towards the surface, a warm touch captivated my arms. My instinct told me to fight from the chain but, by staying under the waters for more than minutes, air has been escaping from my lungs as waters were my new air, grappling my lungs. Panic rose on my chest. I tried even harder to get on the brim of the spring side. Tried, kicked and to be free from.
Air!
At last I have breathed air once more. I coughed, spatting waters from my throat.
“ Are you out of your mind?” A roar of an unfamiliar husky voice soared in the air. Even the birds have gawked somewhere in the forests.
I looked back. And here in, the owner of the husky voice, a knight. However not among the valiant ones of my army. He wasn’t one of them. And then, from the back of my mind- an intruder.
“ Defy not the name of your Lord! You filthy commoner!” Rage had engrappled my fears.
“ Won’t you be gracious enough to be saved from drowning?” He raised his voice.
I spat. That wasn’t the way this common man should act. “ Uh, and you dare to address me with the same tone as you speak to lowly lives.”
He curled a smile and surveyed his eyes down my footstool to my crown. “ Then, don’t give your subjects the reason to disrespect you.”
His commanding voice echoes to the whole forest as though he was the king herein.
“ Ah.” I crossed my arms and looked upon him. He was tall enough. “ So, you’ve come to judge and mock your Lord? Aren’t you being hypocrite?”
“ What foolishness does you speak?” he paused and stare his hazelnut eyes back at me. “ And how foul does your mouth spit?”
“ You aren’t just arrogant but an ingrate. Nevertheless, I wouldn’t let you escape from such rudeness. What could I expect for mudbloods like you.” I turned my back and started to pick up my cloak.
“ You sure to impress me a lot,” He twitched a smile again. “ Your highness.” Mockery was his tone.
I stopped midway on putting my cloak and walked back to him. “ You really do know how to impress me as well. Now tell me the name-heaven bestowed upon you and heaven forbids for you were created.”
An answer that I expected from him has changed from the uproar of his laughter. He was amazed, I could tell. The moment he stopped, he took off his hood and smile.
“ Some other time, my Lady. Knowing my name is useless for you today. You are about to be held again.” And without further adieu, he walked away. Whilst I, was denowned by some mere fantasy.
“ Your Highness!” An uproar from the woods have echoed to my ears. I rolled my eyes and carried my belongings. Great! Heavens have closed their ears for me.
I bolted beyond the troops. Oh! How despicable my destiny was.
“ Your Highness.” A knight mounted on his horse suddenly came beside me. Still, I didn’t stop by and say my hellos to this palace officers.
“ Your Highness, please get back to the palace. The ceremony shall begin in no time.”
“ Go back yourself, young man. I wish to be alone.”
“ It is our duty that the princess has to be taken back to the court.”
“ Well, I’m not going there. Now leave me alone or I’ll say to court that you be beheaded.” If I was stubborn enough, so has been him. He lays at rest in front of me and held his hand.
“ You will never do horrible things such as that, Princess. Let us go back to court. You don’t want your Mother to die in such worriness, do you?”
It was the only resort, this knight knew of me. I glared at him and took a sigh.
“ Give me Thunder. I pressume he was the one who betrayed me.”
Some courtladies came out. They took in a blanket for me to change my garments to dress me back.
“ Mi Lady, please, never try to outrun us.” A lady said as he put on the undegarments on my hips.
“ My Lady, the castle was worried about your sudden disappearance.”
“ As soon as all of you complain your burdens, can I took Thunder, now?” I borely answer as brushes came to halt my hair.
And soon enough, I was dry again. I swayed on the stirrups and sat back on Thunder. “ Do not mention to Mother, where was I today.”
“ Yes, your Highness.”
“ And one more thing, search the whole place. A pervert has been roaming around and bring him to me.”
“ As you please, your Highness.” they bowed down and bolt their horses.
I hated the way courtyards has to walk with their horses or so like me sitting like a princess on my horse. I rather prefer to be a horseman, juggedly sitting like any other and flying through the winds. Minutes later, we have just arrived down at the civilization.
“ Hoooh” I held my Lipizzaner horse to halt.
The view was astounding that it held my breathe in captive. The ‘ole green fields of vast lands now mounted the joys to be harvested in no time. Harks flew beneath the surfaces of the blue ocean. Pavements glistened to the mere commoners of the villages as joy surmounted the faces of ‘ole folks.
“ Come now, Thunder. The heaven awaits.” as if I was merely talking to a human.
He bolt in like his name and roars to the wind, flying freely to the gusts of wind. I looked back and saw the mountain of our fortress--the world I am confide with. And from the heights of the swift tango we danced with Thunder, I rested him under the cozy and shady oak trees in a nearby river afloats. In a small bag fasten to Thunder, I took off a rustic cloak and wore it. I tucked in my long golden hair carefully.
Down the green set of valleys and a falls watering the streams and the surrounding botanicals, I set on foot. The greeneries of meadows and the fragrare of floras all juxtaposely brought out the forthcoming spring. Even the twittering birds dance and melodiously sang the tunes of spring.
Ah, at last my journey sets on. Not far enough now, behind the valleys, lies a village of an utopian paradiso- my soulful realm. Indeed, a marvelous creation of the heavens. Though at the sight of our kingdom it was a realm of complete utopia, my version of utopia was no more than a complete serenity, complete and submerge beauty like a heaven of fantasies.
The sun twinkles behind the tall and shady evergreens and pines. And of the trees shoots sparkling beams of rays like diamonds etched on your skin. The sways of the surging trees whispers to your ears, singing melodies to lullabys. And as the coldness of the winds wrapped around me, the containment of breeze no longer upholds my longingness for nature. I lowered the cloak and took off my feet’s garments, and walked.
It was subjugated to become a fantasy for me-a real fantasy indeed. A crystal clear spring with wild flowers around, like meadows in Southern France or in Ireland. Oh, such majestic realm--a treasure worth a lifetime. It cannot be compared to the Eden of Israel though both has its own paradise.
I sat on the brim of the spring and soaked my feet to the cold waters.
Comforting yet reviting.
Ah! the smell of freedom, sweet and fragrant. How I could hope for liberty, away from the walls of kingship. How many times have I took a bolder steps for freedom but was never been? Defiance brought out the worst in me. Good heavens! I was glad that they haven’t pass an excommunication order against me and perhaps it won’t be long overdue.
The passing hours has been wearisome that my body was in sore from being held captive. How ironic that inside my own fortress, a ruler and dominant, would be held among her kingdom.
“I just wanted to get away.” I heard myself mutter the words. “ Even for a while.” And dove straight to the waters. Just for a while, I can be alone.
I closed my eyes and serenely be one with the nature.
Depressions of waters brushed towards my face. And slowly opened my eyes and sank at the bottom. Without further noise nor scratch to made, I simply looked around to see the cause of the tiny waves, it simply wasn’t a wave caused by fallen leaves nor flowers or pebbles.
Nothing has shown a cautious distrust and relief erroded my chest. As I kicked towards the surface, a warm touch captivated my arms. My instinct told me to fight from the chain but, by staying under the waters for more than minutes, air has been escaping from my lungs as waters were my new air, grappling my lungs. Panic rose on my chest. I tried even harder to get on the brim of the spring side. Tried, kicked and to be free from.
Air!
At last I have breathed air once more. I coughed, spatting waters from my throat.
“ Are you out of your mind?” A roar of an unfamiliar husky voice soared in the air. Even the birds have gawked somewhere in the forests.
I looked back. And here in, the owner of the husky voice, a knight. However not among the valiant ones of my army. He wasn’t one of them. And then, from the back of my mind- an intruder.
“ Defy not the name of your Lord! You filthy commoner!” Rage had engrappled my fears.
“ Won’t you be gracious enough to be saved from drowning?” He raised his voice.
I spat. That wasn’t the way this common man should act. “ Uh, and you dare to address me with the same tone as you speak to lowly lives.”
He curled a smile and surveyed his eyes down my footstool to my crown. “ Then, don’t give your subjects the reason to disrespect you.”
His commanding voice echoes to the whole forest as though he was the king herein.
“ Ah.” I crossed my arms and looked upon him. He was tall enough. “ So, you’ve come to judge and mock your Lord? Aren’t you being hypocrite?”
“ What foolishness does you speak?” he paused and stare his hazelnut eyes back at me. “ And how foul does your mouth spit?”
“ You aren’t just arrogant but an ingrate. Nevertheless, I wouldn’t let you escape from such rudeness. What could I expect for mudbloods like you.” I turned my back and started to pick up my cloak.
“ You sure to impress me a lot,” He twitched a smile again. “ Your highness.” Mockery was his tone.
I stopped midway on putting my cloak and walked back to him. “ You really do know how to impress me as well. Now tell me the name-heaven bestowed upon you and heaven forbids for you were created.”
An answer that I expected from him has changed from the uproar of his laughter. He was amazed, I could tell. The moment he stopped, he took off his hood and smile.
“ Some other time, my Lady. Knowing my name is useless for you today. You are about to be held again.” And without further adieu, he walked away. Whilst I, was denowned by some mere fantasy.
“ Your Highness!” An uproar from the woods have echoed to my ears. I rolled my eyes and carried my belongings. Great! Heavens have closed their ears for me.
I bolted beyond the troops. Oh! How despicable my destiny was.
“ Your Highness.” A knight mounted on his horse suddenly came beside me. Still, I didn’t stop by and say my hellos to this palace officers.
“ Your Highness, please get back to the palace. The ceremony shall begin in no time.”
“ Go back yourself, young man. I wish to be alone.”
“ It is our duty that the princess has to be taken back to the court.”
“ Well, I’m not going there. Now leave me alone or I’ll say to court that you be beheaded.” If I was stubborn enough, so has been him. He lays at rest in front of me and held his hand.
“ You will never do horrible things such as that, Princess. Let us go back to court. You don’t want your Mother to die in such worriness, do you?”
It was the only resort, this knight knew of me. I glared at him and took a sigh.
“ Give me Thunder. I pressume he was the one who betrayed me.”
Some courtladies came out. They took in a blanket for me to change my garments to dress me back.
“ Mi Lady, please, never try to outrun us.” A lady said as he put on the undegarments on my hips.
“ My Lady, the castle was worried about your sudden disappearance.”
“ As soon as all of you complain your burdens, can I took Thunder, now?” I borely answer as brushes came to halt my hair.
And soon enough, I was dry again. I swayed on the stirrups and sat back on Thunder. “ Do not mention to Mother, where was I today.”
“ Yes, your Highness.”
“ And one more thing, search the whole place. A pervert has been roaming around and bring him to me.”
“ As you please, your Highness.” they bowed down and bolt their horses.
I hated the way courtyards has to walk with their horses or so like me sitting like a princess on my horse. I rather prefer to be a horseman, juggedly sitting like any other and flying through the winds. Minutes later, we have just arrived down at the civilization.
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